Joke joke

1)
Early in the morning the sun rises from the east. A bird flew 1km from east to west.
it took the bird 1 hour to reach his destination. Still in the morning the same bird flew from west to east, but it took the bird 2 hours to get back.
why ???

Ans: Cos when flying towards east, the bird flying towards the sun then very bright.
so the bird one hand cover the eye, the other to flying.


2)
One man was trying to eat this particular brand of photochips but no matter how hard he try he cant eat or bite the photochips, the only way to eat the photochips is to lie down on bed and eat.
why???

Ans: Cos the photochips brand is call Lays(u need to lay down to eat the chips)


3)
this one is from my fren
(Chinese and hokkien version)
A boy was with his grandfather. Then a metal tin fell from above and hit the grandfather head and fainted.
when rush to hospital, the boy told the doctor 10 words.
What is the 10 words?

Ans: gong gong gong gong gong gong gong gong gong hin
(tin) (hit) (grandad) (grandad)(blur)(grandad) (faint)
so it shld sound like this
gong gong gonggong gonggong gong gonggong hin
in english means tin hit grandfather, grandfather blur, grandfather faint


4)
On the floor there is a 50$ and a 2$ note. The old man pick up the 2$ note only.
Why???

Ans: cos the old man feel shoik ma


5)
A big bad wolf finally caught the 3 little pig. The Wolf pick the small and finest pig to eat and release the rest. Why he release the other 2 pig???

Ans: Cos the big bad wolf is the shoik old man in disguise.


6)
Joke = haha
Joke + Joke = laugh out loud(LOL)
Joke + Joke + Joke = laugh my ass off(LMAO)
Joke + Joke + Joke + Joke = roll on floor laughing(ROFL)
Joke + Joke + Joke + Joke + Joke = ?????
Guess the ?????

Ans: KOF( not the game king of fighter but rather King Of Fruits)
So next time if is funny u type in msn kof kof kof... wahahaha


7)
ok got this very stupid joke, is christopher encourage me put in de.
How u put elephant into a fridge in 3 step?

Ans: 1) open 2) put in 3) close


8)
How to put a giraffe into the fridge in 4 step

Ans: 1) open 2) take out elephant 3) put in giraffe 4) close

9)
How you put stuff the monkey wif the giraffe in the same fridge in 5 steps?

Ans: got 2 version answer.
First version: 1) open 2) take out giraffe 3) stuff monkey into giraffe ass 4) put back 5) close
Second version: 1) open 2) take out giraffe 3) put the giraffe into a bigger fridge 4) put the monkey in 5) close

10)
There is a lion king meeting. Each animal need to send a representative.
Everybody is there expect which animal. who??

Ans: giraffe. u Must be asking wad about the monkey. The monkey representative is up on the stage holding simba(the baby lion).